Elder Bednar showed us all the strait and narrow path of his part to Jesus through ordinances and faith and such. Elder Ashton (Dwight Schrute?) reinforced this Jesus message by chatting about repentance. Elder Cook lost me by talking about…

Pres. Monson opened the session with some brief thoughts on the Plan. He was followed by Pres. Nelson who spoke about joy (distinct from happiness), and quoted the great Eliza R. Snow. A well-placed hymn reinforced Pres. Nelson’s thoughts before…

Elder Holland opened attempting the impossible: to convince EQ’s everywhere to go home-teaching. If he can’t do it, no one can. BREAKING NEWS: social media home-teaching is Holland-approved! Holland’s message was followed up by a brief shout-out to home-teaching before…

We opened with a youthful primary missionary choir, who graced us with all the favorites throughout the session. Elder Cook cautioned against the philosophies of men (but said nothing about the philosophies of women), and reminded us of stumbling blocks.…

Pres. Uchtdorf opened by admitting to drinking many liters of an unnamed diet soda (but we all know it was Diet Coke) before turning on the full Sensitive Silver Fox. Heard much about prayer and may have been trapped in…