You won’t miss this.
Four years ago this month I was staring in silence at the concrete floors in my house still in shock as to why my wife left without reason and why she took my baby girl with her. I would go on long drives without determined destinations just to get out of the silence. But all I would hear was screaming. Who was screaming? Oh, it was me. Hopeless. Helpless. I was planning for a permanent exit.
It was only a few months later that I became reacquainted with a beautiful woman that I had met twice when she was a teenager. She was recently divorced. We fell in love. We created amazing chaos. When we should have been at our strongest we were at our weakest. We were married on November 30, 2012 at a gorgeous riverside wedding near the place her grandparents were married 100 years before. All things seemed right in these moments.
February 9, 2013 I was excommunicated from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day-Saints. I don’t miss the hollowing effects of these significant events of my life, but these things don’t last, and you won’t miss them either. I was hollow for what felt like eternity, but the Lord filled my soul with substance of Divine nature that I didn’t know existed, so don’t stop being a vessel to be filled. I was sad, hurt, and angry with no one to blame but myself. That makes it so much worse. I know you, the reader, know what I mean.
July 3, 2015 I was rebaptized by my dear friend and new member of the stake presidency. The Lord’s ways are not our ways. He turns our dear friends into leaders that we can follow. He sends them to our houses. He takes away our old memories. His Atonement fills the void where the pains, hurts, sadness, grief, anger, blame, and even memories existed. This is an exquisite truth that cannot be fully explained but only experienced! The happiness that replaces these negative realities of life is real. Allow yourself to experience the joys of not giving up. There is no failure outside of quitting, for with God all things are possible. You won’t miss this hurt today. Don’t give up.
My name is Eric Fluckiger. I pen under the name NotQuiteEnos. I am no longer anonymous. Find my full story archived at TheCulturalHall.com